见帅哥

今天搭火车回芙蓉时，在KL Central KTM 遇见两个帅哥。真的很帅噢！是“鬼佬” ！然后我们搭同一辆车。在车上，我就想，他们在哪一个站下车？结果竟然跟我同一站，在芙蓉下车。整个路程，我就一直望着他们两个。哈哈！蛮养眼的！可是我好像被发现了，因为其中一个也一直看着我看着他。他们讲着一些我听不懂的话，所以我不知道他们是哪里来的。他们干嘛来马来西亚呢？哈哈，不要怪我太无聊，因为我实在太久没见过帅哥了！

I’m so depressed…..

Got my results today…. I passed… but I got B- only…. B- is considered fail in phase 1!!! There are 2 people got A but they are in different posting. In Internal Med, 3 ppl got B+, 3 ppl got B so B- is just the average. Prof Cheong is said to be very nice, the most lenient lecturer… The other 2 students who under him got B+ and I got B- only. So you can imagine how I did in the exam…. But I can never change the history again. Regret didn’t study, but later I think even I studied, I still couldn’t answer his questions. Jealous those who don’t really study but can do well in exam… Why can’t I be like one of them?

I really wanna do well in my exam, couldn’t imagine if my parents got my results, how will they response? I think I disappointed them. Sometimes I think I am spending too much money in studying medicine. RM30,5000 per semester… Those who don’t understand will think I am very rich la… But now I am just struggling for my life… Have to worry about my tuition fees…

Got scolded by Dr. Loh today. I was elected to be the discipline leader of the Family Medicine posting. So I gotta take attendance and control the discipline of the group. And today, there were 4 students late for his class and Bax and me kena scolded. People never attend class I also kena scold. People ponteng class I kena scold again. People don’t adhere to dress code, I kena scold also. Why is he putting so much pressure on me? Staff Nurse Khairun told me today, Dr. Loh is very particular about discipline, so I am very important. If there is anyone in our batch has some discipline problem, Dr. Loh will discipline-trained me. And she actually went through the test, and it was very ‘menakutkan’. I don’t understand, if the student got discipline problem, train him/her la, why train me? I think I am quite self-discipline but I really dunno how to make others to be more discipline. All these gotta depend on the attitude of individual. If he can’t control himself, how can other people control him? If Dr. Loh gonna train me like that….erm…NO! HE WON’T!! So you guys better take care of your discipline, if not... you won’t be seeing me in this world anymore, I would be tortured by Dr. Loh till death….

In the 1st few weeks of Internal Med, I thought I was coping well. But now, I just feel like hiding myself from this world. I dun like Seremban, but I dun like to stay back in PJ either. I wanna go to some where else without all these trouble. Just give me some break!!! I miss my phase 1 friends, my college friends and my high school friends. There is no1 I can talk to here in Seremban. No1 has similar interest as me…. I just can’t click with them… Every1 is so different here compared to phase 1, I couldn’t describe…I just feel different… or maybe I am the one who being so naïve and innocent… Never ever trust any1 easily, k??

I wanna go sing K again. That day I was not satisfied enough. I was sick couldn’t sing the songs I wanna sing and I dunno what songs to choose. Now I realize I got a lot of songs wanna sing…. But I am broke!!! Btw, quite fed up of Seremban food. Everyday gotta think what to eat, can’t I just have a pill which I will become full after eating it? Seremban food is so so so expensive!!!

Ok.. Don’t worry… I’ll be fine… just wanna express all my feelings… dun wanna put it all in my heart!!!

{Movies} World Trade Center & Stormbreaker

Recently watched movie: WTC and Stormbreaker

1) WTC
Watched it with Racine, Baxter, Michelle Chong, Yee Heng, Brandon and Ling Wei in Terminal 1. I think it's been quite a long time that I didn't watch movie in the cinema. Let me think... my last movie in cinema should be... erm... I can't remember!!! OK.... this proved that I long time didn't watch movie already.

Usually I only watched movie that I looking forward long. But I did't expected to watch this movie b4. Actually I didn't know about this movie at first, I kinda lost track to the world ady. Actually Racine suggested to watch "The Silk", but Baxter doesn't want to watch that (because he scare? haha...) Actually I felt like watching "The Silk" too coz I never watch horror movie in the cinema.

No much expectation, but I think it's quite touching. I cried...

2) Stormbreaker
Watched it with Baxter, Sofie, Wat, Fairus and Ronald. It was after our exam, me and bax were doing nothing in the library and Sofie called bax and asked us to go for a movie. We went to Jusco. We didn't plan to watch which moovie yet and there were only 4 movies showing. "Open season", "Stormbreaker" and 2 other Malay movies. So we decided to watch "Stormbreaker" coz ronald and bax didn't wanna watch open season.

The hero was so cute...ermm... what's his name de?? Alex sumthing....he is 16 yo now...haih.. too young for me la....haha....

However I missed the front part for these 2 movies...I dun like missing any part of the movie. I always enter the cinema earlier and enjoy watching the trailers....

p/s: still can't remember wat movie I watched b4 the WTC. Gubra?? Gotta check back my blog.... mayb I wrote it in my blog...

很失落...

很失落... 每次在很兴奋之后，就会觉得很失落...

昨天去唱K，很开心，因为已经大概有４个月没唱了。可是，我已经很落后了，完全不知道现在流行什么歌。按那个新歌推介，１０首没有１首是会的。唉！其实并不是说没时间去update自己，只是没有管道，没有电视机，没有收音机，没有streamyx...

开心，因为考完试了！过后也很失落。书没读完，就这样去考。后悔... 很后悔！一定要努力，发生那么多事，如果我还这样下去，真的很对不起家人...

很烦！烦CFCS的事... 要迁就很多人，烦！为什我是leader？多了很多不必要的麻烦，花了很多不必要的钱... 要省！要省！为什么钱不会从天空掉下来？

一直是很单纯地相信任何人。可是年纪越大，看到越多人性的丑陋。开始不相信任何人，不要轻易相信人... 因为人是最可怕的动物。

Finished exam!!

Ok... I found I did something stupid!! I was checking my blog whenever I posted something and there were never be any replies. I was wondering why.... until just now. I actually changed some of the settings to moderate the comments. Actually I didn't know what's it mean by "moderate comment", I just click "yes" and thus the comments weren't appearing... Sorry guys... but I've changed back the settings....

Today is my last day of Internal Medicine Posting. Erm... actually is tomorrow. I've just finished my long case exam which was supposed to be tomorrow initially. Was damn stressed b4 the exam. I just got to know the exam was changed to today when I asked Prof Cheong yesterday. And... the MO didn't want to give us any tips... I haven't finished studying... I haven't been practising a lot in the wards...regret that been so relaxed for the whole 7 weeks and during the Hari Raya break.

However the exam was not that scary as I thought. Maybe Prof CHeong was too busy today. He had to take Sem 9 and Sem 6 for exam, and also Sem 5 for CP. So he took Sem 9 1st, and Sem 6 later. I think he was rushing, until Sem 6's turn, he became a bit 'chin chai', never ask us to perform PE in front of him and only asked about the investigations. But I couldn't answer quite a lot of questions he asked, and he kept hinting me and I was so thick-headed. He asked me about the physiology stuff which I never bothered to revise. Ya.. I admit... I've not been studying enough! However, at the end, he said, "It's enoough for semester 6." I guessed he said I passed? Or he was trying to comfort me?

Actually I cheated also. I missed the pleural effusion. I percuss the right lower zone of the chest, it was dull and I thought it was the liver dullness. Then I didn't bothered about it. But later during the ward round, Dr. Cheah presented the case to Dato' Kew, then I only found out there was plueral effusion in that patient. I looked at the BHT (wonder why you can look at the BHT during the exam), and there was reduced air entry. So I did another full Respi examination again. I think the patient was quite annoyed coz he was so quite lethargic but I kept disturbing him. But what to do? I was so nervous!!

Come back to the cheating thing, actually it's very easy to cheat in the exam. You can bring books...only for sem 6. You can ask your friend to help you out by looking the BHT. You can ask the HO for the case before the exam. For me, the BHT was just beside me. So how could I don't look at it? (When I was writing this, I was hoping that no lecturers will read my blog..)

Anyway, everything's ended now. But I still gotta do my case report and case summaries, gotta submit by tomorrow. Oh.. ya!! Also gotta write some commnets about Internal Medicine for Prof Esha. I think I finished all that 1st, then only I will summarize my Internal Medicine Posting.

文字游戏 II ~~ 爱情不能做比较

应瑾瑜要求，我们又开始玩起文字游戏来了。这次是由我出题 --＂爱情不能做比较＂。贻宁要玩吗？瑾瑜你得空再出题吧！

其实一个礼拜前就写好了，一直没有时间post上来。

爱恨交缠
情意绵绵
不吭一声
能了解对方吗？
作为情人 却
比陌生人
较陌生

爱 曾洒在你脸
情 曾烙在我心
不吵不闹 不哭不啼
能为你
做一切
比任何人
较幸福

爱是自私的
情是自利的
不是你最爱的
能撑多久？
做一切 你都无法满足
比起你的她 她
较完美

爱难守
情难久
不得不质疑 爱你的心
能够长久吗？
做只宠物 或许
比做情人
较幸福

爱 或许已不在
情也已逝
不能再挽留
能够的话
做知己也许会好些
比起当情人
较没负担

坏人

为什么人的心肠可以那么坏、那么贪心、那么不知足？

为什么好人都没有好报？好人就要被欺负吗？不是说人善天不欺吗？

为什么？为什么？为什么？

你一定会有报应的！！！

幸福摩天轮

＂人生就像摩天轮一样，有高有低、有起有落、不停地循环。不管我们遇到多大的困难，都要乐观地面对并解决它，因为幸福也许就在困难的后面等着你。＂

Internal Medicine Posting

2nd week of my Internal Medicine posting. Although the posting is quite busy, compare to Surgery and Family Medicine, I think it's quite fun. I start to appreciate Medicine, see real cases which we just learned from the book by names.

I like to go ward round, seeing different patients in diffferent character, though it's quite tiring standing in the ward the whole morning. Then in case presentation, which we have to present our case to the doctor, it's something like KKB stuff, but we learned more things here. Often after we just said one sentence of the chief complaint, the doctor would stop us and ask us the differential diagnosis. Then all of us will try to drag out all the diseases we learned in phase 1... Something like House... He always says, "Differential diagnosis!" Then we will list out all the differential diagnosis. All the lecturers in Clinical School are very knowledgable. I respect everyone of them. They are so nice to teach us and they are all so good. Didn't notice that when they taught us in Phase 1. Unlike in Bukit Jalil, some lecturers just know their specialty but not other stuff. Here, in Clinical School, everyone knows everything. Wonder how they did that??

Till now, I've seen quite many interesting cases, including DKA (Diabetic ketoacidosis), facial nerve palsy, congestive cardiac failure, SLE (systemic lupus erythematous), renal failure, myocardial infarction and ischemia (which are quite common)... I manage to elicit positive signs in the patients. Unlike in CSU, the simulated patients are all normal.

Meet quite a number of nice House Officers and Medical Officers here in Hospital Tuanke Jaafar (previously known as Hospital Seremban). However there are also HO/MO who are not so friendly and unapproachable. Next time, if I become a HO/MO, I swear I will be nice to the medical students... Haha..

Yup, not to forget the seniors! They are so helpful and friendly. I am not kidding, we really need the seniors' help here. We felt so lost in the beginning of the semester, luckily the seniors are so nice to us, bring us around...

Till now, I have on-call twice. The first on-call I didn't do anything. I heard some of my friends did CPR and took blood. I haven't got chance to do both. However yesterday, my 2nd on-call, I saw a case in A & E. He fall from 2nd/ 3rd floor, and he was unconscious. He has no breathing, and we had to use the pump to ventilate him. So we took turns to pump the bag. The HO-on-call was Dr. Koh, a UPM graduate. Heard about him from Arathi, and she said she felt in love with him when she 1st saw him, but too bad, he is married. HAHA!! He is really nice because he signed his name in my log book, so that my log book won't look so empty...

Gtg now, have to walk back home... *sob*

Barbecue Night in Seremban

Barbecue night... this was one of the orientation programmes in Ciinical School Seremban. Bascially we, the Semester 6 student, have to prepare performance and food for the seniors and the guests.

So, we were actually quite busy during the 1st week of our posting. However we have to meet up with our orientation group for the barbecue night. For our group, we have to prepare chicken wings for food and a play for the performance. We didn't really prepare much for our performance. Nisha came up with the idea of playing something like "Malaysia Idol" and Ben Shyen wrote the script (actually he just came up with the storyline and we have to came up with our own lines).

Other groups practised their performance every night but our group didn't practise our play at all until the very last minute before the night. We nearly gave up because Ben didn't want to play the gay role and members not coming for practice. None of us were motivated to practise. Finally we decided to kick out the gay role and we started to practise 1 hour b4 the night.

The MC was played by Melissa and the three judges were Nisha, Awatef and Patrick (but Patrick didn't appear that night and he was replaced by Victor who wasn't our group member). The contestants include Jin Aun, me, Tanga and Ben. Poh Tian and Nina, 2 small girls, acted as the security guard and Sally played as the cleaner. Initially, I supposed to play as the MC but there's no script and I didn't know what to say. So I changed role with Melissa, who was initially playing as a contestant who can sing well. But later Ben didn't want to play the gay role so I asked him to play my role since he can really sing well. At last, Awatef came up this idea that I have to play as a super childish contestant who sang "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star".

We practised twice and hoping everything would be fine. We really did't put any hope in our performance because other groups put in more effort than us. There were 5 group of us, group 1 was performing an Indian dance, group 2, my group, performing "SS Idol - Shock Sendiri Idol", group 3 was performing "Mario", group 4 sang songs which Johan wrote the lyrics which were so so so funny and group 5 performing a play, too, which was 'in prompt to'.

I think the "Mario" was really cute and funny. Try to imagine the Mario we used to play during our childhood, played by a real person. If you can't imagine, watch this! This idea came from the current semester 1 performance in variety night. The video above was played by the Sem 1. So basically group 5 just copied the idea. The songs sang by group 4 were funny too. Johan wrote the lyrics which reflect medical student's life in IMU BJ & Clinical School. If I got the lyrics, I'll post it here.

After all our group performance was not that bad at all. There was one lecturer gave us the highest marks. However the champion went to mario and the 2nd went to Johan's group. Satisfied with the results...

After the performance, the guests and the seniors got to have their dinner 1st. We, the sem 6, gotta stay in the hall to listen to the ex SRC president and the current SRC president's advice. After that, when we came out, we gotta queue up for food and the food was finished b4 my turn. I only got some fried noodle and 1 chicken wing. We prepared so hard for the performance and food, but we didn't get return. And the seniors actually thanked the guests and the seniors for attending the barbecue night but they didn't thank us for all the preparation made by the sem 6. They only thanked us for coming...

However I do have fun enjoying the performance. Looking forward for the next sem barbecue night...